Wednesday, July 11, 2012

Ugh chub rub and heat... never a good thing


Summertime, the wonderful hot time of year, you know that time of year where no matter what you do you can’t escape the heat. That time of year that “chub rub” is used at least once among friends in casual conversation or the term “sweating like a whore in church” is understood by many, and I don’t care if you’re a man or a woman there is some part of your body that is going to be sweating profusely, that is uncomfortable, sticky and the thought of running around naked has crossed your mind several different times, but thank god you refrain because, lets face it, there are people in this world that many of us would much rather poke our eyes out then to see run around naked in public….and yes there are others that I and others wouldn’t mind if they did run around naked all the time…for me Jared Leto would be number one on my list…but that is a whole other conversation. Back to the heat of summer and all that goes with it.
I will say that as a girl with “Curves” as much as a like summer I can’t stand sweating and well I will admit to it as I have before I sweat I don’t fricking glow.  No I sweat like a stuck pig or as my aunt would say “like a whore in church”, and its one thing to sweat when your working out, but to sweat while sitting on your butt watching the Olympic trials is a whole different story.  I mean I’m almost to the point where I’m sweating for the athletes competing for that one amazing spot to be able to represent their country.  Here is where I’m going with this whole sweating thing, this is the first summer in a long time that I have not had to deal with that infamous “chub rub” due to my thunder thighs. There is nothing worst than wearing a pair of shorts and it looks as if your thighs are eating your pant legs, because it taste so damn good (num num num).   You also have to deal with the chaffing and lets face it, its not a great sight and it just sucks your hot, sweating and your thighs feel like sandpaper (awesome).  Who would have though that losing a little weight and toning your legs up would stop that event…AMAZING!!!   It’s great this year not having that issue which is making this a great summer even with the heat.
Now lets not forget another god awful place to sweat, that spot right under the chin, that spot for all of us that have a “little extra weight” might really understand this comment, its that spot that can easily make you look like a turkey that little gobble, gobble spot right under the chin. That spot that when you lay down if you have to much fat there you have the chance to look like Jabbba the Hut, it’s not a good look and yes I have been there, and in the summertime it totally sucks.  It’s like your extra fat layers just stick together and acts like a dam for sweat.  It’s gross on so many levels, I just can’t really even explain, and I’m sure everyone who has this issue or might have this issue will completely understand.  I know for me this is the one thing that really points out that “HELLOOOOO I’M FAT!!!!” which just sucks ass. Yet this summer even with the heat yes, I have this issue of a “sweat dam” every now and again but for the most part its gone, my little double chin jiggle jiggle is almost gone, which has helped make this summer of apocalyptic heat not as bad as it could be, and I don’t feel fat anymore, this little monumental thing is totally epic to me.   
So with this amazing summer of unbearable heat couple things to remember.
  1. Stay hydrated
  2. Wear sunscreen although I normally don’t I figure I should throw that out their as a good tip
  3. If your still having chub rub issues use powder to soak up the sweat and stop the chaffing
  4. Please reframe from taking your clothes off and running around naked in public unless your Jared Leto or even Shannon Leto then please feel free to take it off and run around my house naked I know I will not mind and neither will my roommate
So stay cool, stay hydrated avoid the chub rub and keep pushing forward
Tell next time a no chub rub and turkey gobble, gobble summer out.

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